Dating behaviors of sociopaths
He looks at you with a stone-cold blank stare and says, “You’re probably right,” then maniacally laughs. But if you know in your gut that there’s always been something a little off about him, he seems “too good to be true,” and you are rationalizing a bunch of red flags because you like drinking the punch, you might want to phone-a-friend and ask for an unbiased third party opinion because a good friend will have no qualms telling you hate they hate your boyfriend if he sucks.
The word “sociopath” tends to bring to mind someone who is so self-absorbed and exploitative of other people—someone you probably would never want to date.
I’m also aware, as my friend and I always joke, that there is something to be said about us for constantly dating these weirdos (and attracting them in the first place) but let’s face it the answer is because they are always so ridiculously good-looking and downright charming. Of course he said that super charming thing that knocked you right off your socks. Any intelligent man could, I imagine, watch The Notebook or read Cosmo and come up with sweet things to woo you with, but a vast percentage of the male population simply does not do this. He’s gonna call me first thing in the morning.” Insert huge eye-roll/sigh combination on behalf of every friend that has ever listened to one of these wholly transparent rationalizations spewing from a friend’s mouth. You are reading way too deep into things, basically always.
I also like to give people the benefit of the doubt and not automatically assume people are livin’ la vida loca, and that has clearly worked out very well for me. If you genuinely think that you or someone you know is a soce you should probably go speak to someone about that ASAP. Also way to be super creepy and act carefree all the time while you’re really just observing and saving up ammo to use against me at a later time.
They mimic emotions and pretend to be people they aren’t as a career, literally as their profession.
He is a professional emotional manipulator with narcissistic tendencies – that is his job description.
If he’s constantly trying to one-up you, frequently suspects you’re lying when you’re not, cannot trust you for the life of him, and lives in constant conspiracy-theory level denial of the fact that you do really mean it when you say you love him back then you should drop-him-like-the-hottie-he-is. There is no surefire way to spot a bad egg until you really get to know someone, and even then it’s still pretty hard.
Lying isn’t great under any circumstances, but sociopaths will regularly do it to get their way, with seemingly zero regrets.A pro-soce would know what to say in the moment as it was happening because he’s practiced, but this soce was not the sharpest soce in the shed. One time I actually got to witness this phenomenon and I imagined him doing one of those weird deep-breathing and eyes-glazing-over transformations in the other room. Those are not real emotions, he probably doesn’t understand what love feels like, and he most likely just loves the idea of you. So when you ask, “Didn’t you say the other day that you cared about x,y,z? The world isn’t over because the picture-perfect image of yourself that you clearly spend way too much time crafting has been damaged for .0001 seconds and to one person. the world, there’s an 80% chance he’s a soce and it’s partly cloudy outside.” he goes completely Carrie on you (the horror movie, not Bradshaw). Especially if the blow-up is followed by, “I am so so sorry. I’m not usually like that.” Then insert some sorry excuse a la # 3 and an “it will never happen again” and you’ve got a great recipe for a socio-casserole. Especially if he always has to have the last word and always has to be in control of the situation.The following is a non-scientific, guide as to whether you are dating a soce-like dude and should set that hawk free. Yes, he does this on purpose, in fact he enjoys it. I would have conversations with one of my exes, while we were dating, and he would just look me right in the eyes and be like “How does this make you feel? Oh, that is very interesting.” This is next level crazy.An undercover soce-with-the-most thrives at the swooning process. To him your love affair progresses almost like the plotline of a Nicholas Sparks novel. To him the molding and manipulation of your mind is like a game of chess, as one of my exes professed: “It is all about the chase and the challenge. By the way, be on the look out for my yet-to-be-penned novel entitled “Confessions of Admitted Sociopaths: My Exes Edition.” He always knows the perfect thing to say to you in any situation. This is to draw you closer and keep you under his weird voodoo-like spell. Last time I checked I didn’t sign up to be part of a psychological experiment or research study at Penn or something.
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He rehearses how to convince people he is feeling sad, or angry, or he loves you.